I have a friend who I’m not quite sure what to do with anymore. She was part of my close group of friends but she distanced herself from everybody by making everyone around her uncomfortable to be near her. She blames the group but honestly it was her own doing. I’m still quite friendly with her but only on a one-on-one basis.
I’m having a party tonight to catch up with friends and it’s also halloween. She was invited but now, at the last minute has made up an excuse not to come. I know she’s lying. What i don’t get is why she’s lying to me. I know the situation because she talks to me about it every single time we catch up. “oh you guys are all in a couple and you only talk to each other about couply things,” which couldn’t be further from the truth but why lie? I know she’s lying because it’s on facebook that she’s heading out with other friends and not in fact, going to work tonight.
Honestly i don’t care that she’s not coming. If i could have, i wouldn’t have invited her because unfortunately everyone has a better time when she’s not around. Including myself. I feel i have to include her in conversations, make sure she’s ok despite the fact that we’re all 25. But i had to invite her because a) she is my friend and b) it’s easier to invite her than not to. Despite the fact that she always makes excuses not to come when she’s invited out with us, she constantly complains that she’s never included in things. Yet she will never include me in anything she’s doing because “it’s not my place” to invite you along. WTF? What does that even mean? Is heading out suddenly an invite only thing?
Frankly I’m really sick of it. I’m sick of being laid back and open about everything that people just use it as an excuse to lie to me because they know in the long run that i don’t care. And it’s true, i don’t care if people don’t do something they don’t want to. That’s exactly what i do, but i don’t make excuses. I’m honest. So why not just tell me the truth?
I get it. I really do.
I’ve also been the one who has been uncomfortable in situations so i know how it feels. I know what it’s like to seem to be the odd one out.
So i do get it.
It’s just a shame that this one girl, when I’ve given her no reason to think I’ll be mad at her, feels the need to lie to me.