I don’t have alot of close friends. I have alot of acquaintances and I have alot of friends that I see in groups but I don’t have many one-on-one friends.
Lately this has become a problem for me because honestly, I’m actually quite lonely. I’m an introvert, so being alone has never been an issue for me, but alone has now changed to lonely, and that is a problem.
My partner works 7 days a week. I work 4. Most of my friends work 5, and alot work hospitality/retail hours. I spend at least 2 of those 3 days that I’m not working, on my own. I’m struggling to make new friends, good friends, at the ripe old age of 25.
I’ve joined a gym, looked into volunteering, done dance classes, I get involved in most work-related social things but just can’t seem to make anything stick. I’m not a horrible person so I know that’s not it. In fact, I’m probably one of the most positive people I know. Is that off-putting?
Girls my age tend to bond over drinking and boys. I can’t really get involved because I don’t like drinking to get drunk, and I’ve been in the same relationship for the past 9 years. I’ve found that when I do meet new people, It’s not a good idea to talk about the fact that I’m actually happy in my relationship and that my partner isn’t a selfish pig and who is actually considerate and likes spending time with me. It’s makes others uncomfortable, so I find I don’t speak as much as I’d like to. I’ve been in this relationship since I was 16, so I also don’t have any “boys are dicks” stories.
I honestly don’t know what to do. I hate feeling this way. I hate seeing couples on weekends going to brunch together and being able to enjoy their time together because I get jealous that I can’t do the same. I hate that my friends only ever get together to go out and get pissed. Yes, I know I can go with them and not get completely obliterated, but after doing it for so long, I got over it.
So after writing that this morning, I’ve been online and found a couple of local meet ups in Melbourne. Basically it’s a website where you can type in what you’re interested in and groups come up matching those interests, giving you the option to join the group or not. I’ve just joined one and hoping I can get to my first meet up on Sunday for an African dance class!